The Significant Process of Attachment
Acknowledging attachment as a process, as explained by Debbie Laible, a Ph.D. and professor of psychology at Lehigh University, is crucial. As you care for your baby, their affection for you intensifies each day. Rest assured, they may not verbally express it, but their unique language communicates their gratitude.
Verification of Parental Recognition
Curiously, within a span of few weeks, babies can recognize their primary caregivers, favouring them over others as per Alison Gopnik, Ph.D., author of ‘The Philosophical Baby’ and a professor at The University of California, Berkeley. Intriguingly, recent 2021 research published in Breastfeeding Medicine demonstrated the potent influence of a parent’s breast milk’s smell, as it can even alleviate a baby’s discomfort and pain.
Interacting and Engaging with Your Baby
Approximately a month post-birth, your baby reacts to facial gestures, leading the caregiver to reciprocate instinctively. Goofy display of emotions, like smiles and looks, and interactions play a monumental role in establishing a firm bond. Face-to-face interaction is instrumental in teaching your baby the principle of positive exchange. By landing a single gaze on you, your child reveals their joyous state due to your presence, a gesture reciprocated by your beaming smile.
The Power of a Baby’s Smile
Contrary to the myth that early baby smiles are involuntary, some recent research supports the idea that newborns do flash genuine smiles. Sparkling ‘social smiles’ start brightening up your day around 6 to 8 weeks. Once your baby begins to associate your face with feeling good, the bond deepens.
The Intensity of a Baby’s Stare
Right from their birth, a baby is capable of recognizing their parent’s voice and smell. The next step involves coupling these sounds and smells with visual evidence. As a result, they ‘examine’ your face attentively, attempting to internalize its features, learning what assurance and love look like.
The Bestowal of Baby ‘Kisses’
From around the age of one, babies begin manifesting their affection through sloppy yet endearing kisses delivered to the closest part of your body. These explicit shows of love suggest that your baby has keenly observed your demonstrations of love and wishes to replicate them.
Recognizing Your Child’s Attachment to You
Their Deep Desire to be Held
After approximately six months, babies develop the physical and cognitive capabilities to request a lift-up. This plea is a non-verbal affirmation of the deep trust and adoration they share with their primary caregivers, which might even move your heart.
Bouncing with Joy at Your Return
Witnessing the elated reaction of your baby when you return even after a few minutes can give you ‘rockstar feels’. This joy not only melts your heart, but also signals the deep bond that has burgeoned between you two.
Mimicking You
As early as their infancy, babies and toddlers start parroting you. Be it babbling over a doll, toting a miniature briefcase, they express their admiration for you through imitation. Following the activities and behaviour of those they love most sincerely is their way of complimenting you.
Running to You When Hurt
The fact that your child seeks you out for consolation following an incident indicates their dependence on, and love, for you. The drama resulting from a minor accident when you are around is a deliberate plea for your undivided attention. This reassurance cements the belief that your love for them matches their feelings for you.
‘Bad’ Behavior Reserved Only for You
All parents can attest to the stark discrepancy between the child’s behaviour at home and their conduct in public. Children tend to exhibit marked restraint when outside, reserving their tantrums for their safe-space at home. Though it may not be the most affectionate way of expressing love, it still counts. Every outburst at home is proof that they trust you to love them unconditionally, even when they aren’t behaving their best.
Fear of Your Departure
From one year of age till around three, children often manifest separation anxiety, which often subsides once they realize that parents will always return. Learning the reality of object permanence frightens them- the beloved parent exists even when out of sight.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: Are there differences in how babies express love and how toddlers express it?
A: While there are indeed differences, many signs, such as affectionate gestures or attempts to mimic you, will persist.
Q: What should I do if I can’t understand my baby’s behavioural signals?
A: If you’re having trouble understanding your baby’s signals, don’t hesitate to seek advice from a pediatrician or an early childhood expert.